Get Tea Know Me Tag

(I’m sorry that’s probably my worst pun yet)

If I’m going to lose my blog tag virginity it might as well be with the rather lovely Helen, right? (You can take a cheeky peak at her blog here) She nominated me for the Get To Know Me tag a few weeks ago and I was initially a bit apprehensive as I wanted my blog to promote my beliefs opposed to me, but then (I want to tell you some really empowering story about self-awakening but realistically) my ego told me to stop being such a martyr and I decided to do it. So now here we are, sandwiched between some controversial society posts, a little chance to get to know me- don’t pretend you don’t want to.

Are you named after anyone? I don’t think so, I’d ask my mum but she’s probably held up in Waitrose searching for organic ratatouille ingredients. I feel we should presume I’m not and await further update.

Feminot Listening

A quick Google and we get the definition of my third favourite thing in the world (after cheese straws and my mum of course):

We could click the arrow for more definitions but I don’t really think we need to as the summary is so simple. Equality. Feminism is the belief that men and women should be culturally, politically, economically, socially (and any other -ally you can think of) equal;  with that in mind, why is ‘feminist’ one of the most controversial labels in modern society? Or maybe more importantly- why do people hate us so much, and to such an extent that they feel the need to trend comments such as #FeministsAreUgly or #FeminismIsAwful? So let’s get some things straight, let’s iron out some crumbled duvet misunderstandings and hopefully enlighten anyone that gets kicks out of telling us to go ‘burn our bras’ (Dad I’m looking at you) on what we’re really all about.

Things Feminists Are Tired Of Hearing

Cosmopolitman

I feel we’ve been chilling rather nicely in the freezer at Half Girl Half Teacup (or HGHT for those that can speak fluent acronym- I lost my membership to that club after a small LOL incident back in 2012, “So sorry to hear Mike’s died, lol xx” apparently it doesn’t mean lots of love. Moving Taylor Swiftly on.) my recent posts have been rather gentle compared to my previously topical discussions and so I thought I was time to get feministing again. And I don’t mean to brag but I’m, like, really good at being a feminist.

So here we have it, my favourite magazine: Cosmopolitan. I’ve bought a copy from what feels like every newsagents in Brighton- last year I even got a German print with the hope of translating it (which is incredibly difficult as ‘clitoris’ isn’t in the Collins Easy Learning dictionary)- but then I noticed something.

Take this Cosmo cover for example:

GCSEcrets

I’ve been waiting, since May the 12^th, for the fact I’m doing my GCSEs to settle in. (I’m hoping its like the emotion equivalent of buses- you know how you wait for one and then three come along at once- I’ll just wake up tomorrow and suddenly be overcome with feelings.) Because right now I simply don’t feel like my GCSEs have been all that they’ve been built up to be for the past 11 years (no biggie or anything) of my school career; the class of 2015 has almost conquered the lengthy trek up exam mountain and our biggest struggle has been getting rid of finger dents from writing so much. Where’s the frostbite? Where’s the severe altitude sickness? Where’s the dramatic cliffhanger when someone is literally cliff hanging and needs Ben Fogle (my stunt double) to swoop in and save them from death? Instead we’ve got some chewed penlids and twitter uproar over Jane and her blady Edexcel sweets. In homage to the underwhelming nature of the exams so far, I thought we should discuss the THINGS THEY NEVER TELL YOU ABOUT EXAMS (or as I like to call them, GCSEcrets)

Revision You’ll decide that the week before your first one is a great time to start the Game of Thrones box set and risk confusing your entire historical knowledge with the political situation of the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros. No, the war of the roses didn’t involve Gwendoline Christie fighting her cravings over a tin of Cadbury’s chocolates. Note that binging on TV also becomes instantly acceptable when Netflix decide to release a new series (Orange is the New Black we’re all looking at you) mid-exam season so, obviously, physics has to be deprioritised.

Emoji Invasion

After  the purchase of every iProduct- before going to put the kettle on or have a panic wee- users immediately install the emoji keyboard. It’s like the unwritten iLaw (can I copyright that?) that you must have and regularly use these so called symbols in everyday life and while I usually agree, after a laborious analysis of my set I can’t help wondering for some of them: “Apple, wtf were you thinking?”

Have you every properly stopped and stared at the random little creatures right next door to the yellow crying emoji face that you always use despite not being able to tell if it’s happy or sad? Have you ever debated with your emoji using friends whether THOSE HANDS (we all know the ones) are hi-5ing or praying? If not, then good. Because I’m about to analyse them for you.

Emoji invasion 1: Running Man